A couple weeks ago I picked up Jentry from daycare and, as usual, I gathered her things from her cubby. Miss Celeste prepares a summary of the day on this lovely form so the parents are able to stay in the loop of what their child is learning / doing while they are away. Usually, I love seeing this paper because it helps me decipher what is real versus fiction in Jentry's version of the day. However, on this specific day, there was a not so lovely note on the bottom. Not exactly what a parent wants to hear about their precious little pumpkin.
At first I wanted to believe that the teacher was slightly exaggerating and that Jentry would never act like the note described. I wanted to be totally shocked, as if this kind of behavior was totally uncharacteristic of my angel. Unfortunately, I have witnessed this kind of behavior at home and knew that the teacher had written a fairly kind description of my strong willed little girl at her worst. This side of Jentry does not come out often, but when it does it can look pretty ugly.
Miss Celeste is a fairly new teacher to us as Jentry just moved up from the Big Turtles room to the Koala Bears room this past summer. I asked Jentry about her day on the way home. She said, "It was fine." I then asked if maybe she had a rough day. She said, "No." Then I asked her if she, by chance, had to go to the office. She said in a whiny voice, "Well, maybe I don't want to be a Koala Bear, maybe I want to be a Turtle again." I asked her why she didn't want to be a Koala Bear and then the truth finally came out.
I called Jentry's dad to tell him about the note and he was shocked. He said he had never seen her act like that for him. I couldn't help but think to myself.....Really? That night I spent quite a bit of time thinking about the note, Jentry's behavior and parenting. I wondered if maybe I was doing something wrong in disciplining her. Maybe she was starving for attention. Maybe this was just the beginning. Maybe she would one day end up sitting in front of a psychologist blaming her mother for everything bad in her life. OK, so maybe now I was being a bit dramatic. Maybe every three-year-old acts like that from time to time. Maybe she wasn't feeling well that day.
The very next day I was elated to find this in sitting in Jentry's cubby!
A HAPPY NOTE! Complete with a star, wearing sunglasses, sticker. This was exactly what this mother needed. That night I reminded myself that no mother really has all of the answers. There is not one, for sure, way to properly discipline children. Every child is different. I am sure that every parent knows these things, but sometimes we need a HAPPY NOTE to remind us that we are doing just fine.
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